Hotel Reception 8: Hunting ham

It was a quiet day but the cook did not arrive so I had to play hunt the dinner for the old lady. There were written instructions for it to be served at 20h but she came out 1/2 hour early looking for it. Her meagre fare consisted of melon, bread and Bayonne ham. I had found several types of ham but never having tasted this local speciality I was at a lost to identify it so I had to ask the old lady to pick it out from a line up of the usual suspects.

I wasn't told who my replacement was and had to ring the boss on her mobile to be told, it's P, of course, whom I had replaced yesterday and who also replaced me on the same day.

When P arrived, he said he had to call the boss that morning to staff the reception.

Hotel Reception 7: Here comes the bride

I was asked to work 3pm - 8pm at the weekend as the hotel was only going to have 1 old lady but was closed to everyone else on account of the boss's daughter getting married. I was there to provide a presence and to answer the phone. I thought the shifts were going to be easy with nothing to do but take calls. Little did I realise how wrong I was.

I found out that the reason the boss said the hotel was full was that the hotel was going to be used as free accommodation for the mainly Italian wedding guests as the boss's husband is Italian.

When I arrived, the morning receptionist told me that because the guests had eaten breakfast late, he had left half the washing-left undone. There were 32 guests and he asked me to lay the tables for the following day's breakfast.

The wedding guests assembled at 3:30pm and left at 5pm but 4 of them left with only 15 minutes - typically Latin.

I did not expect to see them again today.

However, most of them arrived a couple of hours later to be met with a power cut. Something had tripped the fuses. One of the guests tried to help as he is an electrical engineer. The old lady came to tell us she had no electricity. No doubt her personal air conditioning unit had stopped.

One of the guests is an electrical engineer so he tried to help with flicking the switches in the fuse box.

The guests asked for many beers and water, and had they understood French or English, I would have been assertive enough to ask them speak to the cook who would normally handle food and drink orders. Instead I had to run into the kitchen to request the drinks from the cook. As I was not behind the desk, the guests ended up going behind it to grab their room keys.

After 1/2 hr we managed to get the electricity back on.

P who I had replaced and who was due to replace me kept phoning me to as he didn't know who was replacing him the following morning as he had to look after his kids from 8 am. He had tried ringing the boss and her already-married daughter, who also manages the hotel but they weren't answering the mobiles. As he didn't have her number, he asked me to phone the bride. I didn't refuse but said she was busy. I did ring her brother and her youngest sister but they too were incommunicado.

When P arrived to replace me he tried phoning the boss and her family, to no avail. My contribution was to find the website for the chateau where the reception was being held and he phoned to leave a message to call back. I would have asked to speak to the boss as that happens in all good films, with a phone being brought to the table. As he had no response, he threatened to leave the following morning leaving the reception unstaffed.

Hotel Reception 6: Promotion through pregnancy

C, the pregnant woman had some contractions but not the contractions so didn't turn up for work. So, M was left in charge of the kitchen as she was the only one working there.

Hotel Reception 5: Powered up

I was left alone at the hotel without any management for the whole of the afternoon so I could make all the decisions. So, I ended up telling most of the callers to ring back tomorrow.

Hotel Reception 4: Small dogs allowed

A lady with dog requested a room. On being told it only weighed 2.4 kg, the boss agreed to her request

Hotel Reception 3: Closure due to marriage

The boss was annoyed the 70 Euro parasol she bought the previous day had broken. I think that happened when the wind blew it over when I had been left alone. I somehow omitted to mention this to her.

I was asked to work the weekend. In return, I demanded 2 days-off. Apparently, the boss's daughter is getting married and she has closed the hotel to everyone but one old lady.

Someone phoned up asking for their mobile phone charger. Apparently it had been sent to him as he left it but it went to the wrong address. The hotel sent it out again but he still hasn't received it.

A student rang up looking to have my job but the boss sent him away with a flea in his ear.

Hotel Reception 2: Rugby

A man wanted to keep his insulin fresh so we bunged into the fridge next to the Cokes. We played rugby with the freshly laundered sheets and towels by throwing them from the ground to the first floor ; from the first floor to the second and thence to the third.

I was left alone for 2hr went the boss and the rest of the staff went home. The kebab man rang up about something of which I was not told about and I asked him to ring back after I left. However, he insisted he be phoned back. 2 men arrived for a meeting and I had to ring the boss. She said she wouldn’t meet them till the next day but they were busy.

Hotel Reception 1: Into the deep end

I had my first day as a stagiaire (placement worker) in a hotel as a receptionist.

I was shown the desk and told to answer the phone. Then, the boss walked off without telling me how to check in/out guests. I didn’t understand a caller so he asked me if I spoke English which I had to reply to in English.

Someone from the restaurant came up to the reception with money for their meal but I had no idea how much it cost and the serving staff couldn’t be bothered to help out. Finally, the boss had to take his money.

Burning up

I woke up at 1330, just after my mobile phone alarm went off. Cleaning the flat and ironing in 33 deg C is no fun. Eating pasta with a bolognese sauce melted me once more.

Nightclub

I went to a nightclub with the French women that the 2Ts of the group had met. It was near the train station and was massive with several dancefloors and about 50 glitterballs, in 3 upside down pyramidal layers. The club shut down early and threw us out before 4am.

After being told the 2Ts had gotten a taxi back for 15€, we waited 1/2 hr for one. The driver took a long detour to go via the dual carriageway and said it would cost 50€. We weren’t happy but reluctantly complied. Big T said he would get our French teacher to complain to the taxi company. “Good Luck” , I said.

When we got back to Le Résidence at 5am, it dawned on me that V was petrified of moths & mosquitoes. However, spiders held no fear for her. So, I spent 1/2 hr standing on a chair crushing the life out of them.

Bastile Day

I went with the group to the Lac in the North of Bordeaux. It's a lake with a life-guarded swimming area. Most of the group hated the floating aquatic flora.

I went to the River Garonne to watch the Bastille Day fireworks which were spectacular. I also saw a parade of veterans, motorbike flics and fire engines beforehand.

I ate at a fast Oriental cafe as it was about the only place apart from McDo that was open. The Thai chicken was lukewarm and not spicy. The steamed pork was fine. The rose tasted like vinegar.

Despite launching 20 minutes late, I managed to get the early night bus as it was 10 minutes late. I saw the bus held at the lights as my tram slowed to a stop and I had to sprint from the tram to the bus-stop.

Soup Glorious Soup

I managed to keep down a Cup-a-Soup and bread. My first meal for 2 days – it tasted as if it came from a Michelin ***.

Brokeback Bordeaux

I woke up with backache, neck ache and stomach ache.

Sleeping for 13hr out of 16 probably wasn't a good idea

My stomach ache persisted all day and I was forced to fast.

Night bus nightmare

I only had 4hr sleep after getting the last night-bus but felt the most exhausted I have ever been – like death warmed up. I struggled into the French class but couldn’t concentrate despite doping myself with a gallon of coffee.

After the class, I went home and slept all afternoon and evening.

World Cup final loss

We went to the same bar to watch the World Cup final; the French audience were surprisingly even-handed, clapping after the Italian equaliser. However, they cheered on Zidane after he headbutted.

Oh I do like to do be by the seaside

We went to Arcachon, which is in a bay 1hr SW of Bordeaux. It has a pretty beach with expensive seafood restaurants offering sea-views

Strolling Saint-Catherine Street

The July sales have started and I was jostled during my trek along the Rue Saint-Catherine, which at 1.2 km is the longest shopping street in Europe, beating Amsterdam’s Kalverstraat by 200 m.

World Cup semi-final win

We went into Bordeaux to watch the Football World Cup with France versus Portugal. We watched it at Le Petit Prince bar on the terrace staring at a big screen. There were over 50 people outside but the atmosphere was less frenetic that had an English game been shown in an English bar.

We had to catch the last night-bus at 0130 and it was packed. I had to stand most of the way next to a bottle-swigging black French teenager.

Imperfect French lesson

Our first French lesson was a waste of time as the intermediate/advanced class I was in was re-taught the present tense. Then we covered the imperfect tense, of which I was already familiar.

Tour-much

We kicked off with a 2hr tour of Bordeaux. It has some old and attractive buildings but after 1hr, I could take no more French and switched-off.

Up an alley without a bus

We assembled at Southampton “airport” although it was so small that the train could stop outside. We were flying there ostensibly to save money but I think it would have been cheaper to fly from Luton. I had applied to go to Bordeaux for 14 weeks to improve my French, with expenses covered by the European Union. A week of French lessons and 13 weeks of work in the hospitality industry. There were 10 of us at the airport. 5 pathfinders had flown out a week earlier. Most were pre- or at university students. Only a few were old enough to have proper jobs. Many were going to or were already studying French at university.

Our flight was uneventful on a BAe 146, rather than one of airline’s propeller driven antiques.

We were told we were being shuttled bused to our accommodation but on arrival in Bordeaux we found this wasn’t the case – we had to get taxis. The 3 taxis travelled in convoy but they didn’t know where they were going. After 5 min, we had arrived. We were staying at serviced apartments near the airport, over 10 km from Bordeaux. We had to share single beds!! We were promised fold out beds. Later that evening we began to get our own rooms but mine had no hot water.

We tried to get the last day bus to Bordeaux’s wine festival but failed due to an uncharacteristic act of French hyper-efficiency, I had been looking at the summer timetable for 5 July onwards. We walked for 30 min to the town to find food but only found closed bars and restaurants. Finally, we found an open petrol-station and a pizza takeaway with al fresco tables. The pizza man took one order at a time, made the pizza, waited for it to be cooked and then took another order. With 10 of us, it took over an hour for us to get fed. I had a pizza with an egg on it that was like an omelette. My hunger made it taste fabulous.

Bordeaux bound

I'll off to Bordeaux tomorrow to intern in the hospitality industry for 3
months, ostensibly to improve my French.